Engineers, Knick Knacks and Short Deadlines

There was a clip on the news last night involving the BP president being questioned by a number of USA politicians. He really didn't have any answers or solutions or apologies. They showed a picture of an oil saturated pelican and I'm so sickened by the sadness of it all. Really can't they do more? I saw Apollo 13 when the guy comes into the room full of engineers with a box of knick knacks, dumps it on the table and says you have the weekend to figure out a solution or those guys die. Where are those engineers now and can BP please hire them because they got the job done. Unlike the current problem solvers. Seriously we are going to plug the hole with dirt and golf balls and its going to stop the flow. Have you ever tried to plug a volcano with dirt and golf balls and expected it to stop the flow of lava? Forget the heat for a minute and just think about the pressure. I admit I don't fully understand the factors involved in shutting down the leak but really the environment and wildlife are at stake here. So gather up a box of knick knacks, get your engineers together and give them a painfully short deadline to fix the problem.

A Few of My Favorites

Unposted

Most days I have a blog entry written in my head. My more recent blogs have been composed while doing yard work but like most days it never makes it to the computer. I usually forget what I wanted to write about by the time I sit down at the computer or I start and never finish. Well today I finished two but they are so old they appear back when they were started. Old. Rotten and smelly by now.

Kids say the darnest things

People keep saying I should write down the things my kids say. I haven't done it but I thought I would share some of the more memorable ones courtesy of my oldest, now 5 year old daughter.

1. After catching a ride with me to school for the last couple of weeks, Tesla was asked by her father if she thought the bus driver will have given away her seat. Tesla responded "No." When questioned further she said "Of course my seat hasn't been given away. It's attached to the bus."

2. I was trying to get Tesla to practice for her spelling test which wasn't going very well.
"Mom is this about that spelling test?"
"Yes"
"I'm not going that day."
"Where are you going to be?"
"I'm going to Africa."
"What are you going to do in Africa?"
"I'm going to wear sandals and play with my new friends. And I'm leaving tomorrow and I'm not coming back until the day after the spelling test."

3. "Mom, Anna and I are going on a trip to Africa without you and Dad. We are leaving tomorrow because all the airports are closed after that and I think you should get me a new twitterbee as a good luck gift."

4. She actually said "Kill the Jews" as the first play date we had with an family in the community. I had to do some major explaining about the story of Esther from the Bible; which she was trying to re-enact. There haven't been any more play dates with them. For the record we are not anti-semantic.

5. When Tesla was two we were driving down the road and Karl was bugging her. Out of nowhere she says "Daddy you're dickless"
Me "What? Where did you learn that? That is terrible! You need to appologize to Daddy right now..."
Two weeks later "Daddy your dickuless" I think she was trying to say ridiculous.

Slide Shows

In the last year or two we have attended many different events which have included a slide show. (Funerals, weddings, birthday's, and retirement parties) I haven't looked for a list of "rules" for making slide shows but I'm fairly confident that the following guidelines would hold.



1. Don't use pictures that are out of focus.

2. Don't include pictures that are not about the celebrated person.

3. Play the whole song through before changing to a new song.

4. Choose one or two transition types for slide changes.

5. Show each slide for the same amount of time.

6. Choose one font type for the entire slide show.



I am sure there are a number of guidelines to follow but these are the ones that currently stand out in my mind.



Oddly enough my husband commented on this after departing from the most recent event. He noticed the music and blurrly pictures. I say oddly because Karl isn't particularly picky about visual things. I'm not surprised he noticed the music but the pictures...

The Price is Right

When we were little we would arrive home from school just in time to catch the tail-end of The Price is Right. As a 10 year old mine I was always completely excited when the contestant had the opportunity to win a new car or trip and completely sad for the poor sap who got the new couch or appliance. I just couldn't imagine why you would be excited about something so boring.

In my first year of teaching I brought in an episode of The Price is Right to talk about probablity. One of the first prizes was a couch and a girl in my class immediately said with a sense of disgust "Oh, it's just a stupid couch. I don't know who would want to win a dumb couch."

Funny how positions can change. I was 10 years older than my student, living on my own, with roommates and paying my own bills. In our living room was a hand me down couch that had a piece of plywood under the cushions. It was really uncomfortable but better than sitting on the floor and I realized in that moment that winning a new couch wasn't so bad. In fact it was exciting. I would like to win a new couch. I would jump up and down on stage and try my hardest to win that beautiful new, comfortable couch. I would paint the walls to match if I needed to. I would like a new couch. At that time I would have liked a new couch more than say a new car, because I needed a couch and I knew it would be a while before I could afford one.

On my fridge is a list titled "Jen's expensive wish list" and until recently I had new van floor mats on it. When we bought our van it was gently used and came with floor mats made for a truck. They never fit properly. They have a big lip that sticks up 2 inches around all the ends. People are always triping on the lip. They are shaped differently than the space they are in and needed the extra ends shoved under seats and around the molding. The truth is that they look junky and made our van look junky. I truly hate them but there really wasn't anything wrong with them in terms of function. Yes, they caught the water and there was always a question of need vs want. Do we need new floor mats or is that a bad use of money? Do we need new shower curtains just because I don't like the colour of them? I can never convince myself to spend the money when the only real problem is that I don't like them. So I suffer in dislike everytime I look at these things I hate but don't replace.

My dad saw my list and surprised me with new floor mats for my birthday. He went to the dealership and ordered them special for me and I just finished installing them. And I love them. I love them so much. They fit. They lay flat. They aren't an ugly faded black colour but a beautiful tan colour. I'm so happy. I feel... I feel like I just won the car on The Price is Right. Thanks for the floor mats Dad!

Le's talk books

I just finished reading "The Book of Negros" by Lawerance Hill. I liked it. I liked it a lot. In fact I just put it down and thought I might just read that again right now. It is one of the few non-Christian books I've read in a long time that didn't leave me feeling wrung out when I finished it. Most mainstream books that are "all the rave" have some horrible, terrible wicked thing or multiple things that happen in them. For example, I had heard a number of people recommend "Fall on your Knees" so I read it and when I was finished I needed to debrief but I would never ask anyone to read that book. There is a lot of incest among a large number of other things. When I read a book I don't want to feel sick to the stomach when I am finished. Which leads me to my next problem... Christian books. The phrase "lets be real" comes to mind. When I read Christian books I get frustrated with what I would call fluff. "So our heroine is walking down the street having just lost her job. She is devasted and has a quick prayer and when she is done praying she looks up and sees a help wanted sign. She goes into the establishment (which is owned by and incredibly hansome man) and is hired on the spot." That is chapter one.

I recently read a book by Lori Wick who I believe has missed the mark. I have read a number of her books; most often just after I've read something mainstream that has left me shell shocked. In this particular book, the climax is when the main character realizes she is in love with this man who has recently become a Christian. He is going to break up with her because she is not a Christian but at the last minute she realizes she needs Christ in her life and now they can get married. The truth is her audience is a bunch of women who have been raised in the Chruch and are leading Bible belt Christian lives who will call out Amen's when they read these books. I was raised in the Church but I'm still frustrated with this book. I can't call out Amen because I think if we were real, in a real world they would have got married. One Christian and one non-Christian because in a real world that's more likely to happen. That would be the beginning and the book would be about the struggles of the mixed beliefs and values. If you want to reach people other than the Bible belt women then lets talk about the sins, choices, struggles and the consequences that are real in peoples lives. Which brings me back to mainstream recognized books which I believe are too real to reach most people and don't have a message of hope that Christian books include.

I'd like my list of respected and recommended authors to increase. My recommended book list includes all of Francine Rivers (who isn't scared to write the book all the way through the pain of death, loss, affairs, sin, rape and the other hurts of the world with a message of hope) (Does anyone know the name she wrote under before she became a Christian?), Lynn Austin (who has a taste of fluff but weaves a beautiful story), "The Poisonwood Bible" (that will leave you feeling wrung out) and "The Book of Negros" by Lawance Hill, Sophie Kingsella (who writes fluff but it makes me laugh), "Is there anyone out there?" by Marian Keyes (watchout for the mystism), "Belong to me" by Maria De los Santo's. I'd love some recommendations and I'd like to know what you thought of some of these books.